Mending Fences

So I often will say that I love all things chocolate and to a point this is true. There is however a large portion of the chocolate industry I don’t like, a company to whose chocolate I’m rather indifferent. That is Mars products, now don’t get me wrong I love Galaxy (See I’m not a complete monster.) I’ll also often choose M&M’s over Smarties, but both are cool with me. But the rest of their products (including their namesake Mars bar) I could quite easily live without.

The problem is most of Mar’s products incorporate real turn offs for me. Firstly I don’t like chewy or sticky caramels in my chocolate. No, the caramel needs to be gooey and runny like you’ll find in Dairy Milk caramel bars. Next I don’t really like a bar that skimps on choccy for a solid block of biscuit running throughout. It’s like the product is a bit confused and shuns the sweet aisle and is eyeing up the biscuit barrel like it holds greener pastures. Both these things can hinder the chocolates ability to melt on your tongue which is what I tend to look for. I like to savour my chocolate, not bite it away at once.

Now if I were to put these two qualities into the much loved and possibly overused vend diagram, I think you’ll agree that you’d find a Twix bar. This bar to me is the worst of the worst, partly because of said fall in the diagram. Also it’s probably partly to a mistaken belief I held onto during childhood that Twix bars contained nuts. Up until very recently I have avoided nuts and nut products due to hatred towards them. This hatred however has gone replaced with much apology and regret at the missed nutty opportunities. Whilst I was wrong for both my hatred of nuts and my belief that they lurked within Twix I stayed clear in case.

See the lengths I go to for you guys!

It’s ironic the that today’s review is seeking to form a bond betwixt (HeeHee) me and Twix in the form of peanut butter Twix. Like the rest of the United Kingdom I am experiencing an obsession with all things peanut butter so saw an opportunity to indulge in the latest craving. Upon first bite I was hooked in by the taste of salty peanut butter and a flirt of chocolate. Even better was that the biscuit seemed to have

minimal impact and wasn’t very detectable. The only downside was that the peanut butter seemed a bit too sticky but I wasn’t complaining. It was pretty damn good and it looked like grovelling to the Twix gods was needed.

I think the state of the wrapper shows how eager I was to repair relations.

Then the second bite and subsequent bites occurred and I was in for disappointment. Suddenly the chocolate was undetectable the peanut butter lost its flavour and worse the biscuit was very much present. The biscuit is terrible too, despite bragging itself as chocolate cookie it has no flavour at all and is way too crunchy. I realised with horror that my initial bite at the beginning was the end of the bar where the chocolate ratio is high. Now however i was in the middle of the biscuit ocean with the chocolate shore in the far horizon. I was eating a chocolate bar devoid of a chocolate flavour. The cookie too lacked any of its own and the peanut butter sticky and had lost the partnership with the chocolate.

Twix peanut butter is definitely not high on taste instead it offers crunch and stickiness. Put simply it is a bar for those who enjoy texture over taste, I am not one of those people as you can clearly see. So I’m afraid that this purchase wasn’t the catalyst that rebuilt any burnt bridges. Instead like an unhappy marriage the only thing that grew was resentment.

Score

4 out of 11

Found

Sweet Haven store in Thurrock shopping centre

Final thoughts

I'm probably now going to be able to think of loads of Mars products I like... Malteasers