Thursday, 29 August 2013

Cheap, Cheerful and the chocolates not bad either.

So I’m sat in a tent, plonked in a field, in Berkshire England. The first two being very unique activities for me individually but together well readers I’m through the looking glass. As those who have read my last post will guess this review is being written from the Reading festival (although typed up on my return and posted who knows when).

For those who don’t know Reading festival is named after the place not the activity and is a music event and not an enlarged book club. It’s about midday and the sun has heated this tent up to the point where I can barely stay awake. So here volunteering for a ticket, this basically means for a week I’m babysitting around 90,000 drunk and stoned music lovers. It’s been interesting so far to say the least, but hey-ho a free pass is a free pass right? In all this madness and second hand smoke I’ve managed time to divulge in my own personal recreational high of choice, sugar.

No expense spared on packaging clearly
Last night my two tent-mates and I went on an evening “stroll” to the local Tesco’s for supplies (local here meaning a two hour round journey/adventure). Somehow I “accidentally” stumbled upon the confectionary aisle, whilst there couldn’t help buying some form of chocolate for the times ahead. Fittingly I chose a bar of Tesco’s basic milk chocolate, partly due to a limited budget but it also fits in with the feel of “roughing it” of camping (I’m a manly man and therefore there is none of this
“Glam-ping”. No sir!)

To be honest despite dreading the idea of leaving my modern comforts behind and pitching what is essentially a plastic bag as shelter, I have found it quite relaxing. At one point I was caught lying down in the sun for quite some time content with doing nothing at all. So it seems right that the product for this review be in the same back to basic theme. Perhaps a bar of plain milk chocolate will refresh my palette which has become accustomed to weird combinations and exotic flavours of late. There is after all a large soft space in my heart for the dependable milk chocolate, especially if it features a happy frog at a happy 20 pence apiece price tag.

Simple things, simple minds
So here I am writing and eating chocolate together again for the first time in three days (at one point I almost went to the Samaritan tent for help!). Long story short, it was heaven as you can expect after the hiatus. They say your environment alters how you perceive the food you taste and in this case it is certainly true. The heat from the day has softened the bar in my bag to a perfect point where upon placing on my tongue it melts immediately. It may be Tesco’s cheapest bar but it tastes good. Very sweet, very creamy and very milky, just the way uh huh uh huh I like it. Nothing fancy but exactly what I needed. I’ve always preferred these cheaper milk chocs to dairy milk as they often tend to be a little too sweet and sickly. The textures great too as it has an almost fudgy feel as some of the cooler parts take longer to melt.

The other side to this tale comes to you later as the British summer does its thing and turns into a torrential downpour. My pod in the tent is like a freezer right now and I’m wrapped up and dreading the next shift I have to work. Growing weak this chocolate has to have enough strength to cheer me up as I’m buffeted by the breeze. Unfortunately in a cool environment this chocolate is like a Victorian Mother cold, harsh and reserved. Gone are smooth flavour, texture and sweetness. Somehow it has been replaced by a slab of solid tasteless chocolate which is chewed into a lumpy mush. It’s become very plain now and tastes quite cheap. Worse still some has gone crumbly and been lost to the crevices of my sleeping bag. Such a dramatic change demonstrates how delicate the simple bar of cocoa can be that the whole flavour can be altered by the weather.
My tea making facilities, impressed?

Overall though I did enjoy this bar, I knew I would as I have had it before. I f kept well this cheap bar can be as in flavour as the premium choices. It’s full of flavour and has a great texture. Be warned mistreat it and it will turn on you like a bitch.

5 out of 11

Tesco in Reading

Final Thoughts
Drunk and stoned people are great to have a conversation with believe me.

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